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By not responding with anger, surprise, or disapproving words, you teach your child that this curiosity about his or her body is a normal part of life. After a class trip to the zoo, the hot topic of conversation for a group of 9-year-olds is often the funny-looking mating behavior they witnessed between a pair of the zoo's creatures. This awareness is called gender identity. Most experts agree that it's best to react to this kind of news in a neutral way — don't encourage the behavior, but don't express concern either. Preschool "boyfriends" and "girlfriends.

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Why Play With A Child

Kids this age start to understand the difference between boys and girls, and can identify themselves as one or the other. Answers like "The stork brought you" not only dismiss a child's curiosity, but also make parents look less credible when kids find out the truth. They spend a lot of time wondering if they're "normal" and comparing themselves with their friends. Of course, if an older child or adult is involved, your concern would be legitimate. Birds do it, bees do it. If you find your preschooler playing doctor with another child around the same age, it's important not to overreact — to them it's just an innocent game. If your school-age child isn't asking you about sex, consider initiating some age-appropriate conversations.

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The responsibilities of the noncustodial parent

Parents may, however, want to explain that even though it feels good, touching should be done in private — preschoolers are old enough to understand that some things are not meant to be public. Babies' earliest emotional attachments are formed with their parents through physical contact that expresses their love. Tolerance and respect are learned behaviors. As always, be honest — kids of this age will jump to their own conclusions when they're missing information. They're also old enough to understand that no one — not even family members or other people they trust — should ever touch them in a way that feels uncomfortable. But actually, sexual development begins in a child's very first years.

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Description: Being truthful now also encourages your kids to come to you with their questions in the future. If your youngster says this, remember that kids don't attach the same meanings to the word that adults do. As always, be honest — kids of this age will jump to their own conclusions when they're missing information. By preschool, most kids have developed a strong sense of being a boy or girl, and continue to explore their bodies even more purposefully. Most likely, it's a combination of both. Puberty can be a very confusing time, with lots of physical and emotional changes, and kids need to know what to expect in the months and years ahead, even if they're too shy to ask. Some react with surprise, disgust, or embarrassment, but most are curious even if a bit giggly. If you aren't a reliable resource, your child may turn to a peer or perhaps an older child for information about sex, sexual organs, and reproduction — and chances are slim that the facts will be correct and that the words learned will meet your approval. Of course, if an older child or adult is involved, your concern would be legitimate. Gender roles are culturally derived.
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